Welcome to Night Vale Book Reviews

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Welcome to Night Vale. This is unbelievably bad writing. And the 50 five star reviews are a sham as most admitted they hadn't even read the book yet! I want my money back. How does Apple even allow this!!

Inspirational. As I was passing through the ninth realm of agony, I came across this peculiar mortal tome. I scoffed at it’s insignificance, ready to incinerate the very memory of its existence, and yet something gave me pause. Maybe it was the supple brown cover made of human hide, the embossed title “Welcome to Night Vale” spelled out using bits of teeth and bone, or perhaps it was the inky yellow substance which dripped from between the pages. Whatever it was, I closed my gaping, fiery maw and used my eight tentacle or flip from page to page. I am astounded by the quality of delicious terror it instilled in me, and how deeply inspired I am to return to the time of my youth where I would devour entire civilizations. Oh, to hear the dulcet screams of mortal peril once more! Thank you, Joseph Fink, Jeffery Cranor. You have given me fuel for a new era of bloody rampage, a veritable eternity of hellfire and hangnails to inflict upon the lower dimensions! AND ONCE I AM DRUNK ON THE BLOOD OF LAMB-PEOPLE I SHALL COME FOR YOU, NIGHT VALE. ALL WILL BOW BEFORE ME AND GLORIFY MY UNDEFINABLE YET FINABLE BEAUTY. COWER AND QUAKE, JOSEPH FINK, JEFFERY CRANOR, FOR YE SHALL KNOW TRUE DESPAIR BENEATH THE SEARING TOUCH OF MY IRON TENTACLES. Also omg Carlos sounds so hot. Not bragging, but scientists are kind of my thing. I cannot wait to flay him with my telekinetic mind powers, and then un-flay him and re-flay him over and over and over again until he is completely devoid of feeling and consciousness. I WILL SHATTER HIS MORTAL MIND AND MAKE HIM MINE. HE SHALL LOVE ME, FOR THERE WILL BE NO OTHER CHOICE. I’ve, like, always wanted to try that out. Thanks guys, you’ve given me long, long life newfound purpose. xoxorolfttyl

Get it get it get it!!!. I can't wait for October!!!

Informative. I think that the part where Earl teaches us how to oven bake temporal wormholes was especially informative. like, accurate enough to be able to cook your own at home. My wormholes were delicious, and I assume I was delicious to the wormhole, because it sent me back seven months.

totally City Council-mandated reading material. Wow, this book is going to be spectacular. I mean, not that I'd know. Not like I have heavenly derived powers of divination or anything. Nope.

A review. After listening to night vale for two years now I was eager for this book and let me tell you it lives up to anyone's expectations. It is perfect . Just as perfect as Carlos's perfect hair. ALL HAIL THE GLOW CLOUD

ALL HAIL. And one star for each of Hiram McDaniels' heads.

Tamika Flynn. Sad is not the reader without a book. Sad is the reader who wants no book. Sadness is not an aching heart. Sadness is a lack of a heart. We are all very sad. Please give us back our hearts. -TF

Reminder about books. This just to remind you all that books are banned even books about our beloved little desert town. I mean really who would want to read these dangerous books? (Besides Tamika Flynn.) But I'm sure city council will approve on this book. :)

Surreal And Humorous. "Welcome to Night Vale: A Novel" is a longer form story set in the surreal world first described by the hit 2012 Welcome to Night Vale Podcast. As a podcast listener, I had no trouble slipping into the familiar world of the isolated desert town of Night Vale where eldritch horror is normal, and virtually every conspiracy theory is just a part of everyday life. I think the novel would allow the uninitiated to begin to understand and accept the weirdness of Night Vale and its residents, like the Sheriff's Secret Police who keep order, or the gruesome and ravenous beings known as librarians. The novel's main characters are Jackie, who runs Night Vale's odd pawn shop, and Diane, who is a office worker, and is trying to be a good single mother to her shape-shifting teenaged boy, Josh. These two women find themselves wrapped up in a mystery involving a nearby place known as King City. These women come together to overcome their problems, and eventually become friends, as they work to find out why the mystery of King City has disturbed their lives. The Welcome to Night Vale Community Radio Show, and its beloved host Cecil, makes a appearance in the book as interstitial chapters. These sometimes seem to have plot related information, and sometimes not, but they are always amusing. Throughout the novel the witticism and dry humor that characterize the podcast shine through the text. The novel does advance the Night Vale world-building. The reader gets to visit the interior of City Hall along with the protagonist as they pay a visit to Mayor Dana Cardinal. We also get to experience the grim horrors of the interior of the library as Jackie and Diane undertake a dangerous mission to look up some information. I think "Welcome to Night Vale: A Novel" is a decent weird story on its own, and could be understood by an accepting but uninitiated reader who likes the surreal without it being too serious. If you are already familiar with the podcast, it would be a rich and complementary addition to the lore of this very strange place.

Welcome to Night Vale. All Hail the Glow Cloud.

💜💜💜💜. We all know this is a plot set up by the librarians.

Guys. Guys calm down. Yes it will be a great book. But calm. This is why people think we're crazy.

Carlos XOXO. Oh Carlos, my wonderful beautiful Carlos. How it was so wonderful to do that thing we did together. You know how we opened that portal and for a brief eternity were able to be together once more. My dear sweet beautiful Carlos, how I love you always. 💜Cecil

All hail!. We all know this book will be perfect. So I am giving it a preemptive 5 stars. All hail the glow cloud

A review. This is a review. A review in which I describe why I gave this five stars. This book is amazing you'll love it. Even though I had to travel back in time to give this review, it was worth it. You could have just given this review in your present time you say. Well, the secret police have taken all electricity. Anyways, as you read this book in the future, periodically hailing the glow cloud, you will be filled with happiness for this book.(but be careful not to overflow with happiness it's really hard to clean up). So trust me, the book is awesome. I gave it five stars didn't i.

Yes so much yes. If this book is at all like the podcast then five stars just doesn't cut it I'd say a solid 19 maybe even 20!!!! So here's those 20ish stars. But really. Who's counting?🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟

ALL HAIL. THE MIGHTY GLOW CLOUD

A True Nightvale Tale. Usually, as a fervent listener of the podcast I'm left with more questions than answers when it came to Welcome to Nightvale. My friends and I would discuss theories and possible connections that could make heads or tails of a strange new event or figure. This novel, took that same formula but added one more delicious and satisfying thing. A resolution. Most Podcasts of Nightvale are based on reports that are reported by Cecil after an event occurs. His guess is usually as good as ours when it comes to things. Unfortunately and fortunately for us, Cecil is only there to report as is his passion and career. The method of this drove mystery and intrigue into listeners as they craved more answers but instead received more questions. Of course, the Podcast itself doesn't just act as a report. It's a story. Many stories making a larger story. Arcs of death and disaster laced with anticipation and thought provoking strange mannerisms. Which is why the novel succeeds. It not only provides a more personal and emotional view from the actual people witness to the events of the story, but it follows the same strange formula. What makes Nightvale, Nightvale is not simply explained. It's accepted. I began the novel expecting, well, maybe expecting the podcast and possibly something different as well. I got what I expected and that, actually shocked me. I was confused as Nightvale does well to naturally confuse anyone's rational thought process. Seeing such a normal oddity for Nightvale was quite extraordinary and strange, if you're able to understand by now. This novel was crafted with love and enriched with only a humor and touch that Nightvale can offer to any listener or reader. All you need to do, is to accept it. Then you'll understand. Also, please treat Tarantulas with kindness. They're simple creatures, unlike ourselves.

YEEESSSSS!!!!. I don't even have to read it and I know it'll be good. Just as long as they talk about Carlos's perfect hair.

ALL HAIL. Tamika Flynn approved

Everything the secret police has always told me I wanted. This book was just wonderful. I've been a fan of the podcast for almost two years now but I didn't quite know if it would translate well to a written format. Let me tell you son, it did! It was riveting and it sucked me in. I felt like I was living in the same surrealistic dream Jackie and Diane were. It hit on all the right notes, tied in all the podcast call backs, and over all was just entertaining! Bonus points for adding in pink flamingoes boys.

As great as expected. The podcast is so amazing because of the writing. Of course a book with the same writers would be as amazing.

books bad. aren’t books bad??????!! but i still can’t wait!

5 Stars arent the only thing its getting. This book coming out right after my birthday is fate, its a book im probably going to read in 1 go, SO EXCITED!!!!!!!!!

ALL HAIL. ALL HAIL THE MIGHTY GLOW CLOUD. And now for the weather.

APPROVED.. This book has been municipally approved by the Night Vale City Council. If you wish to get your hands on a physical copy, please remember that corporeal books are dangerous and attract librarians. The City Council reminds you that most books are banned eternally. Except this one. Thank you.

Granted. this is not “great “literature but is was wacky, quirky, crazy…need another word ending in “y”, and funny as all get outta here.

YASSSSSS. I AM SO PUMPED FOR THIS BOOK OMG

Has anyone seen my keys?. I put my keys on the coffee table this morning, and now they're gone.

Very good but the podcast is better. This book is just like the podcast, but the humor and cleverness work better listening then reading the words. It isn't until about 80% through the book that you become fluent enough in the language of the book to read engage with the characters.

A review. This book is, or will be great! I am not entirely sure what year this is, or if this is the right dimension. Everything seems in order, except for being in a post-apocalyptic Luftnarp, and the fact that cavemen, who currently are boiling me with their minds, should not be in Luftnarp, but Svitz. Oh, and the fact that cavemen did not develop this ability. There seems to be wifi, so that's either good, or I am going to have one hell of a data bill if I somehow stop being mind-boiled long enough to escape. Get this book! That is, unless you can only find a copy in a library, nobody should risk going to the library over a book. Nobody.

Welcome to Night Vale. The sample already is amazing, I can not WAIT for the whole book. Although, looks like I'll be buying both the hard copy AND the audio book! Cecil as the reader will be perfect of course, almost as perfect as Carlos.

Tired of thinking your own thoughts?. Hello! Are you tired of thinking your own thoughts? Try listening to someone else's thoughts! Hear these thoughts voiced by Cecil Baldwin: Listen to "Welcome to Night Vale." (audio version only - the voice of Cecil in your head is just a bonus when reading the written word.)

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